She agreed, but asked how he would know when the baby was born.

To keep it discrete, he told her to simply mail him a post card, and write ‘Spaghetti’ on the back. He would then arrange for the child support payments to begin.

One day, about 9 months later, he came home to his confused wife.

‘Honey, ’she said, ‘You received a very strange post card today.’

‘Oh, just give it to me and I’ll explain it later,’ he said. The wife obeyed and  watched as her husband read the card, turned white, and fainted.

On the card was written:

‘Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti.
Three, with meatballs, two without. Send extra sauce !!!!!

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I wonder if Mayo likes spaghetti?  He has been very quiet of late. Thanks for the story pal.

Here is the evidence:

Standing on Torr Head, County Antrim on a warm sunny August day.

Looking towards Fair Head with Rathlin Island off to the right.

I need some of that sunshine now, to warm my bones.

Melt the butter and sugar. Stir in the remaining ingredients. Press into a greased swiss roll tin. Bake for 20 minutes. Allow to cool in the tin.

For Icing:
3 tablespoons orange juice
6 ozs icing sugar

Sieve the icing sugar into a bowl and add the orange juice and mix well. Drizzle over the cold tray bake and cut into squares.

The Linesman ~ Bronze
Sculptor: Dony Mac Manus

At City Quay in Dublin’s revitalised Docklands, this lovely 7ft bronze sculpture by Dony McManus recalls the days when the Guinness boats docked close to the centre of Dublin City. With several new bridges now in place, only small vessels can access this part of the River Liffey.

Can you feel the pull on the muscles?

Massereene Forge, Antrim.

I was on my way to photograph the building above, back in the month of September. It was following my visit to Pogue’s Entry. Alas, I had an unforeseen change of plan, it was the day I landed flat on my face and ended up in A&E at the local hospital.  I am doing fine, but even all these long months later, I have numbness in my face. I still need to think about the food I eat, my meals take longer to consume and I am unable to chew on the right side of my mouth.  I have not starved, and indeed come a long way from drinking coffee through a straw and eating baby soft food.

The Forge was originally built in 1887 and was home to Viscount Massereene’s blacksmith’s forge. The distinctive horseshoe entrance still survives.

I have no idea of when it ceased to be a working forge. I didn’t cross the road today, so what type of stock was massively reduced, is still a mystery to me. I did visit an outlet shopping centre later and nearly every second shop has closed at this stage. I first noticed the gaps pre Christmas 2010. One of the young sales ladies was saying that the leases on the shops were due for renewal at the end of June, she knew of several outlets that would not be renewing!  Sad. Very sad.

What was it GM said the other week?

“It’s never too late to have a Happy Childhood.”

“Yes that was it….  and it is time I took it on board”. Said Liz. “Just look at this rubbish that Dave sent over for me to read this afternoon at TSOP. This is my year, and I have made up my mind.  There will be changes and the pink Hunter Wellies with the dogs on are only the start. Pity the dogs are not Corgi’s.

Let Philip complain all he wants, these boots are not half as silly as those ankle breakers my granddaughters totter around in, or the old crown that weighs half a tonne that I must wear for the duration.  My people have no idea of the headaches it gives me. I will need a triple G&T tonight, I can tell you!

Being the Queen is not easy you know. Changing clothes half a dozen times a day is bad enough without Charlie complaining that he will never sit on the Throne, one half of the family complaining because I send them away on jaunts, while the other half complain if I don’t! It was enough to turn a woman to drink!”

Turing was just what she did at that moment, and headed back to the new throne she had fitted this week.  Buying the Jim’ll Fix it chair was a brainwave.  Sitting down she pressed a button and out slid the shelf with the G& T already poured.  Our Queenie was like Morse. As he used to say to Lewis “I need a drink, No. I don’t need to drink. To THINK.  I need a drink to think!”

“Would you listen to this…

My government this……  My government that…..

A child in junior school would do better.”

Quick as lightening she tore the pages is half and in half again. “I’ll show the Eton twins and that Dennis Skinner - muttering under his breath, I’ll wake the dozy Lords from their slumbers, you wait and see.  I have waited a long time for this!”

Pressing a button on the other arm of the chair out came the headed notepaper and a Blankety Blank Pen*, Uncle Terry Wogan the mad Irishman, didn’t need it anymore.

“This time my government will be in for a shock; they will do exactly what I tell them, It will be my wishes and none of this ‘Jobs for the Boys’ etc.  After all ‘My Hushand and I’ never went to Ibiza or Majorca for two weeks of boozing all night and sleeping on the beach all day. No way. It was months in cold, damp and dark Balmoral for us”.

With another large slug of the gin, she set the pen to paper…

My Government and lords of this place will with immediate effect, reduce their salaries to minimum wage for the duration of this government, without recourse to any expenses. There will be no freebies or overseas travel until they get my country back on its feet with full employment for all.

My Government will legislate for all pensioners to have free travel all over the country and three G&Ts every day. Getting old is difficult and painful enough to cope with, so the G&Ts will act like Morphine and make life seem better.

My Government will legislate for the use of moving walkways on all official journeys during future State visits. No more bone-shaking springless carriage rides down the Mall. We have been well shaken, if not stirred, for the past 60 years.

My Government will legislate for a national Corgi day. They are very under-rated dogs.

My Government will legislate to ditch the Crown, nobody else wears such a ridiculous hat these days. Charlie can put it in his dressing up box.

Now that is enough to be going on with….. I will read the list to Philip over lunch and he can think up a few beauties which is sure to put him in good form.

* A souvenir from the UK TV Game show. A chequebook and pen in gold colour handed out as prizes to the runners up on the TV show.

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The topic Moods was chosen this week by Ramana, I look forward to reading what he and the other active members of the Loose Bloggers Consortium have to say. Why not join me on my rounds: Delirious, Maxi Maria/Gaelikaa, Maria SilverFox OCD writer, Padmum, Paul, Ramana, The Old Fossil, Will Knott.

“How are three people going to travel on only one ticket?” asks an accountant.
“Watch and you’ll see,” answers an engineer.

They all board the train. The accountants take their respective seats but all three engineers cram into a toilet and close the door behind them. Shortly after the train has departed, the conductor comes around collecting tickets. He knocks on the toilet door and says, “Ticket, please.” The door opens just a crack and a single arm emerges with a ticket in hand. The conductor takes it and moves on.

The accountants saw this and agreed it was quite a clever idea. So after the conference, the accountants decide to copy the engineers on the return trip and save some money. When they get to the station, they buy a single ticket for the return trip. To their astonishment, the engineers don’t buy a ticket at all.

“How are you going to travel without a ticket?” says one perplexed accountant.

“Watch and you’ll see,” answers an engineer.

When they board the train the three accountants cram into a toilet and the three engineers cram into another one nearby.
The train departs.

Shortly afterwards, one of the engineers leaves his toilet and walks over to the toilet where the accountants are hiding. He knocks on the door and says, “Ticket, please.”

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Thanks Tilly for allowing me borrow this one.

People running
Checking feeling
Talking, shouting
Clamping shocking

Silence.

In the morning hushed and white
The sterile room was still and silent
Not a sound from those machines
No need for humming pumping clicking screaming.

Silence of eternal sleep.

O’Connell Street with three clocks

The three clocks have been there for years. They are McDowell’s the Jewellers, Lir and Clery’s.

Clery’s & Co. Ltd. Department Store

In late November 1940, Clery’s, opened the doors with a sale, to celebrate a new era under the management of Denis Guiney. This marked a turn in the fortunes of one of Dublin’s most famous department stores.

Originally Mc Swiney, Delany and Co. opened ‘The New or Palatial Mart”, a purpose-built premises in a prime position on Lower Sackville Street, as O’Connell Street was known one hundred and fifty nine years ago. Thirty years later it was taken over by M. J. Clery of Limerick. From 1883 to the present day, the name Clery and Co. has hung over the doors.

Legend has it that Denis Guiney bought Clery’s Store for £20,000. However, this was a partial payment. The true figure was a quarter of million pounds. On the wall of Clery’s Board Room hangs a cancelled cheque for the amount of £230,000, dated in 1941 which completed the purchase of the store. Denis Guiney came from Killorglin, Kerry where his father had a small farm. The eldest son of seven children, Denis left school at 14 and served his apprenticeship in the drapery shop near Killorglin. In 1917, Denis took the plunge and moved up to Dublin where he worked for Roberts and Co.

In 1921 Denis Guiney married Nora Gilmore and opened his first shop at 70 Talbot Street. The shop began at a dangerous time in Dublin. The Civil War raged around the country. Violence surged on the Dublin streets. In 1922 the shop on Talbot Street came under fire and was destroyed. Re-opening in 1923, the Guiney fortune went from strength to strength. By 1940, the turnover in Guiney’s was greater than Clery’s at that time. A year later the turnover reached £1 million.

Guiney’s store’s popularity stemmed from the assurance of good value, durable quality and stylish but affordable fashions. This was the reputation Denis brought with him when he took over Clery’s Store. Monster Sales, Drapery, Furnishing and Clocks, Clery’s Ballroom and the Beehive Bar and Clery’s Restaurant, were among the many features that ensured Clery’s succeeded under the wing of Denis Guiney’s management. Clery’s became a special resort for country people who came in droves at Christmas and on holidays to avail of the guaranteed bargains. Through the forties and fifties, Clery’s developed in the shadow of rationing and the country’s economic difficulties.

Withstanding the transformation of the sixties, Clery’s remained a focal point of the city-shoppers by adapting to the population’s changing demands. In 1967, Denis Guiney passed away but his business ethos was carried on by his second wife, Mary, who preserved her husband’s family tradition. During his forty-six years as an employer, he had provided employment for over 6,000 people and had established Clery’s as a leading department store in Dublin.

Clery’s Clock.

A large clock with two faces hangs above Clerys’ central doors on O’Connell Street. “Under Clerys’ clock” was a well-known rendez-vous, both for Dubliners, and visitors from the countryside, and is famous in the city’s popular culture as a place where ‘first dates’ and many romances began.

No longer considered “our country-cousins” domain, Clery’s boasts of over 70 different units from the fashionable clothing outlets and an affordable range for children. Under the great span of Clery’s roof, you will find something for everyone including China, household goods, clothing, cosmetics, soft furnishings, mobile phones and the largest selection of beds in Dublin. With four separate coffee shops cum restaurants, you will not have to go far to rest your feet during a day of shopping.

No Christmas is complete without Clery’s Santa’s Grotto which has delighted Dublin’s children for generations.

More info about Clery’s

4 cloves of garlic peeled and blanched in boiling water for 3 minutes
Can of chick peas, drained and rinsed
2 tablespoons tahini
1 tablespoon lemon zest
3 tablespoons lemon juice
3 tablespoons of olive oil
1½ tablespoons water
½ teaspoon white wine
½ teaspoon salt
⅛ teaspoon cayenne
½ teaspoon paprika
2 tablespoons of fresh chopped cilantro

Place the chick peas in a food processor. Add tahini & blanched garlic and pulse.
Add remaining ingredients and purée until smooth, then chill in the fridge for 2 hours.
Garnish with more paprika and Cilantro.