Grannymar

A minister from a Gospel Hall in North Antrim decided to do something a little different one Sunday morning. He said “Today, in church, I am going to say a single word and you are going to help me preach. Whatever single word I say, I want you to sing whatever hymn that comes to your mind.”

The pastor shouted out “CROSS.”

Immediately the congregation started singing in unison, “THE OLD RUGGED CROSS.”

The pastor hollered out “GRACE.”

The congregation began to sing “AMAZING GRACE, how sweet the sound.”

The pastor said “POWER.”

The congregation sang “THERE IS POWER IN THE BLOOD.”

The Pastor said “SEX”

The congregation fell into total silence. Everyone was in shock. They all nervously began to look around at each other afraid to say anything. Then all of a sudden, way from in the back of the church, a little old 87 year old grandmother stood up and began to sing “PRECIOUS MEMORIES.”

Jim Reeves - lyrics

Precious mem’ries unseen angels sent from somewhere to my soul

How they linger ever near me as the sacred past unfold

Precious mem’ries how they linger how they ever flood my soul

In the stillness of the midnight precious sacred scenes unfold

As I travel on life’s pathway know not what the years may hold

And as I ponder hope grows fonder precious mem’ries flood my soul

Precious mem’ries how they linger…

According to todays Breaking News

Pope Benedict XVI today denounced what he called the world’s “profit mindset”.

He warned money can turn people into “blind egoists” and urging the wealthy to share their riches with the poor.

Benedict said life was about making choices between good and bad, between altruism and egoism, honesty and dishonesty.

Ultimately, he said, it was about making the choice between God and Satan.

“Money in itself isn’t ‘dishonest’, but more than any other thing it can close man off into a blind egoism,” Benedict said.

He called for a “conversion” of economic goods, “rather than using them for self-interest, we should also think about the needs of the poor, imitating Christ”.

I particularly like the ” urging the wealthy to share their riches with the poor.”

I wonder if he will lead the way and stand on the steps of St. Peter’s Basilica to distribute the enormous funds of the Catholic Church.

The local minister decided that a visual demonstration would add emphasis to his Sunday sermon last week.

Four worms were placed into four separate jars.

The first worm was put into a container of alcohol.

The second worm was put into a container of cigarette smoke.

The third worm was put into a container of chocolate sauce.

The fourth worm was put into a container of good clean soil.

At the conclusion of the sermon, the Minister reported the following results:

The first worm in alcohol - Dead.

The second worm in cigarette smoke - Dead.

Third worm in chocolate sauce - Dead.

Fourth worm in good clean soil - Alive.

So the Minister asked the congregation -

What can you learn from this demonstration?

Maxine was setting in the back, quickly raised her hand and said,

“As long as you drink, smoke and eat chocolate, you won’t have worms!”