Grannymar

In the next week or two I will need more oil. I checked out the latest prices the other night and it ranged from £311.00 to £349.65 for 900 Litres. Now my singing efforts would hardly raise the price of a fish supper and as for the dancing…. well we can forget all about that one thank you!

So what are the options?

Rent a room.

Sounds interesting and it would give the neighbours something to think about. If I rent a room do I want to be seen in all my morning glory minus the smile, wooden leg and glass eye? What if the house guest brought a pet snake, a tarantula or a german shepherd? Well now, that certainly needs more thought…..

There might be some chance if the German Shepherd wore lederhosen and yodelled!

Find a wealthy Toyboy.

If Tommy were a rich man,
Ya ha deedle deedle, bubba bubba deedle deedle dum.
All day long I’d bribe him with some buns.
If Tommy were a wealthy man.
I wouldn’t have to work hard.
Ya ha deedle deedle, bubba bubba deedle deedle dum.
If Tommy were a biddy biddy rich,
Yidle-diddle-didle-didle man.

But Lily might put up a fight, talons at dawn win no awards and we girls need to behave in Cork.

Sell my crown jewels

Alas, the burglars got there first and cleared anything worth more than a second glance.

So what will that leave?

Wait now, I got it!

Flog the Artwork!

I will be sad to let it go but needs must. It is a personally signed ‘One Off’, carefully thought out and designed. A perfect representation of a family group filled with sunshine and love. Now where is the number for Sotheby’s?

I should really keep it under wraps until it goes under the hammer, but on the other hand I would really appreciate your opinion…

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In case you are a little puzzled, we have our hands behind our backs - I know because I asked the artist!

Our beautiful earth is being destroyed.

Day and daily we hear of trees being cut down. These are the same trees that give us the oxygen we need to survive. People are polluting the earth by dumping rubbish on the streets, into rivers, lakes and oceans. Car exhaust and smoking causes smog and makes the oxygen layer in our atmosphere thinner. If we don’t take action, our earth will end up like one big junkyard.

For all the years and more than I have lived here in Northern Ireland, we have had to put up with great plumes of black smoke coming from bombed buildings, burning cars and the 11^th Night Bonfires. They all released a pungent foul smell. These fumes released a large amount of sulphur dioxide (SO2), and sulphur trioxide (SO3) into the atmosphere. These sulphur oxides (combination of sulphur and oxygen) reacted with the water vapour in the air to form very strong acids like sulphuric acid (H2SO4). These acids fell along with the rain and from this we got ‘acid rain’ This rain is very harmful for plant, animal and human life. Is it any wonder the Cancer rates are so high in Ulster.

The burning of fossil fuels like coal and petroleum releases a large amount of these gases into the atmosphere (I am a culprit here as I use oil for central heating and for years used coal for an open fire).

We are warned that the large-scale development of industries and burning of fossil fuels, large amounts of pollutants are being released into the atmosphere. This is causing an imbalance in the environment. For example the release of carbon has lead to the rise in global temperature because of the greenhouse effect.

Back in August in Cold Feet I wrote looking for assistance in finding Eco Wood Briquettes. I managed to find some and this time they are described as African Super-hot fuel logs trademarked as Bushblok. Striking while the fire was hot I asked for 6 packs. There was no barcode on the pack or price label attached. The sales assistant went off to telephone her Supervisor for advice, I waited patiently. Eventually she returned without a price. She picked up her colourful fuel pricelist and picked the lowest priced item and scanned it into the till. “£1.35 per pack” she said, “It is not my fault if they are not marked, I am sure they might be double that price.”

Feeling pleased, I motored merrily home with my winter warmth. It was only when I was unloading the car that I read the label it states:

They are made from encroaching Bush in Namibia, the Cheetah Capital of the World providing sustaining rural business opportunities while restoring the Cheetah’s Savannah habitat. They are useful for cooking fires, braii, home heating, and industrial heat applications. As a result of the extrusion process, it has a calorific value approaching coal, some 4870 Kcal. It has an after burn ash content of 0.35-0.5% and is classified as a Smokeless Fuel.

Smokeless and cheap they might be, but I am sure they left one hell of a carbon trail from Namibia to the UK Mainland and from there through a couple of stops before reaching my fireside.

Should I feel guilty?

We are being encouraged to participate in Blog Action Day on 15th October by posting on our blogs something that relates to the environment. The post can be about anything to do with the environment. The idea is to write a post which is offtopic for your blog OR relate the environment back to your topic in some way.

Consider the gauntlet down, and come back on Monday to see if I have fulfilled my promise.

Or on the other hand, show me that you can do better!

An English professor wrote the words, “Woman without her man is nothing,” on the blackboard and directed the students to punctuate it correctly.

The men wrote: “Woman, without her man, is nothing.”

The women wrote: “Woman! Without her, man is nothing.”

K8 has been busy tagging everyone she knows in the Blogosphere today.

Thankfully she took pity on me and left me alone. I don’t like that sort of thing as I have to work hard to remember my young life… it was so very long ago.

While having a rest this afternoon I was thinking about my Newly Weds.

I gave Elly a bit of a scare last weekend, and instead of pushing up daisies I must keep struggling on. In case she decides to sell my body to science I completed a survey to tell me approximately how much money my darling daughter would get for it.

$4615.00

If you see her running up the road with a pillow will you let me know…

This is still very hush-hush! You must not tell anybody because it is MY secret.

Grandad really, reeeeeeally loves me! How do I know? He has made a proposal. Now you are to say nothing, because ‘herself’ doesn’t know about it yet. He is waiting for the right moment to tell her!

Well the proposal is that I can become a partner in his Web Design Company. Grandad wants me to give him €5,000 deposit as a sign of good faith. The problem is that he wants the money by this time tomorrow.

I suppose I could borrow from Elly’s inheritance. Sure she won’t need it for awhile. By the time she does it will surely have doubled if not trebled or quadrupled. I better check to see how much I have in the mattress.

This is all a bit complicated because he wants me to send it by Brown email. I have looked at my computer on the front, the back and all sides but there is no slot to put the money in. Can anyone help me?

Grandad says it must be a Brown email because he wants to lodge it in his off-shore account…

Now where did he say the account was? Oh yes! Now I remember it is on The Blasket Islands.

Now not a word about this until we find a way to tell ‘herself’ and Elly!