Sabrina Dent and Ina extended an invitation to all of Ireland’s women bloggers to join them for tea and cakes (or martinis and olives, if you prefer) for a few hours before the Irish Blog Awards.on 1st March.
I was ready to scream, and throw something heavy at my screen the other day when I read they were suggesting a pre Awards meet-up for Ladies Only.
Ok, ok! I hear you grumble “There goes that old Grannymar again! She has only one interest and we all know what that is! Toyboys, toyboys and more toyboys!
Actually the word bursting from my lips at the time was ‘Clique’ I saw the idea as a break away from the mood and idea of the day. Next up RedMum is organising a meetup of photobloggers and photographers. I suppose in an hour or two it will be the Pints for the Boys meetup.
Bloggers come in all shapes and sizes, some fresh and young with the urgency of snowdrops about to push through the ground, while there are others like me weather beaten and creaking like the branches of an old tree bending with the weight of a hundred years. This Bertie Bassett Mix is what the blogosphere is all about. What is so scary about it? We chat and banter with each other every day. There are no strangers there, only friends we have not met yet.
I decided to sit on my hands for a day or two and cool down. I lurked as they say and read the comments on the different blogs. Bock the Robber, never shy, asked the question for me. He wrote:
This blog awards thing is coming up soon and I’m looking forward to meeting a lot of people face to face that I’ve only corresponded with electronically.
Now, suppose I announced that I was organising a meet-up but it was only for men. Suppose I said that women were banned from it, what do you think would happen?
Would people call me a stupid, sexist fucker? Would a whole heap of shite pour down on my head from every woman in Ireland for being an uptight, narrow-minded, anti-woman bigot?
Probably.
And they’d be right.
The girls were all for the meetup and King Damien gave it his blessing. So as the song goes ‘I think I’ll have to think it out again!’
I go places alone and have no difficulty walking into a room full of strangers. Well, it is either that or live the life of a hermit! So back to the thinking…
The girls seem to think it is a good idea; some of the names are familiar to me. But who is that Elly she seems to get her nose in everywhere!
The photobloggers might end up clicking their way through the day as it moves to the Big Event and produce a digital flavour for all to enjoy.
This only leaves the boys with the whole afternoon to fix their hair and enjoy a pint in peace.
Maybe with the help of hindsight it is not a bad idea after all. If I make it to Dublin and since my chauffeur Elly is already booked in I might come along.
My little friend Cameron came to see me with Louise his mammy the other day. He was not in his usual bouncy good form. On asking how he was he told me “I have a headache in my tummy!”
Cameron’s mammy was rather hassled because she had shopping to do and the young man was not up to trekking about with her. I offered to look after him, now please, I like my toyboys older than four years of age! Louise was glad of the opportunity to do the shopping unencumbered with a child that was not feeling well.
Once on our own I made warm drinks for the two of us and Cameron and I sat on the sofa with a throw over our legs and we read stories to each other. By the time Louise returned Cameron was sleeping peacefully. Louise was bubbling about her successful forage in the shops and had achieved so much more than if she had Cameron with her. We had coffee and the little treats that Louise had brought back for me. Just as we finished, Cameron woke and bounced about full of the joys of spring.
At this time of year there are plenty of bugs, colds and Flu about. I cannot promise to cure you as easily as I did Cameron but the following might help:
Gut Soother
2 pears 2 carrots
1/2 pineapple 1/2 inch (1 cm) ginger root
The blend of these three along with the ginger not only make a great taste, but they’re good for the digestive tract too.
Cold Cure
1 large mug 3 spoons of honey
3 thin slices of root ginger 2 lemon slices
1 hefty shot of whiskey 12 cloves
Pinch of Cinnamon
Stud the lemon slices with cloves put in mug with the remaining ingredients. Pour boiling water over the lot.
Now we all know that Grandad is very fond of drinking coffee.He is forever telling us about his trips down to the village to have some.Maybe Granny refuses to serve it at home……
An Irish woman of advanced age visited her G.P. to ask his help in reviving her husband’s libido.
“What about trying Viagra?” asks the doctor?
“Not a chance,” she said. “He won’t even take an aspirin!”
“Not a problem,” replied the doctor. “Give him an Irish Viagra. Drop it into his coffee. He won’t even taste it. Give it a try and call me in a week to let me know how things went.”
It wasn’t a week later that she called the doctor, who inquired as to progress.
The poor woman exclaimed, “Oh, Saint Francis tonight! T’was terrible. Just terrible, doctor!”
“Really? What happened?” asked the doctor.
“Well, I did as you advised and slipped it in his coffee and the effect was almost immediate. He jumped hisself straight up, with a twinkle in his eye and with his pants a-bulging fiercely!
With one swoop of his arm, he sent the cups and tablecloth flying, ripped me clothes to tatters and took me then and there, making wild, mad, passionate love to me on the tabletop! It was a nightmare, I tell you, an absolute nightmare!”
“Why so terrible?” asked the doctor. “Do you mean the sex your husband provided wasn’t good?”
“Oh, no, no, no, Doctor, the sex was fine indeed! T’was the best sex I’ve had in 25 years. But sure as I’m sittin’ here, I’ll never be able to show me face in the village coffee shop again!”
