Thursday Special ~ Lions
A man starts his new job at the zoo and is given three tasks.
First is to clear the exotic fish pool of weeds. As he does this, a huge fish jumps out and bites him. To show the others who’s boss, he beats it to death with a spade.
Realising his employer won’t be best pleased; he disposes of the fish by feeding it to the lions, as lions will eat anything.
Moving on to the second job of clearing out the chimp house, he is attacked by the chimps who pelt him with coconuts. He swipes at two chimps with a spade, killing them both. What can he do? Feed them to the lions, he says to himself, because lions eat anything. He hurls the corpses into the lion enclosure.
He moved on to the last job, Which is to collect honey from the South African bees.
As soon as he starts, he is attacked by the bees. He grabs the spade and smashes the bees to a pulp. By now he knows what to do and throws them into the lion’s cage - because lions eat anything.
Later that day a new lion arrives at the zoo. He wanders up to the other lions and says
‘What’s the food like here?’
The lions say ‘Absolutely brilliant.
Today we had fish and chimps with mushy bees.’
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Thank you David for this weeks contribution.
Anil said,
July 28, 2011 at 8:11 am
And the zoo feeds on itself, literally.
blackwatertown said,
July 28, 2011 at 1:01 pm
Groan.
But keep them coming.
Rummuser said,
July 28, 2011 at 1:58 pm
nick said,
July 28, 2011 at 2:16 pm
Now I know what to do with that anti-social neighbour I accidently killed. I’ll just take him round to Belfast Zoo.
Mayo said,
July 28, 2011 at 3:47 pm
What would happen if he cleaned the donkey barn? Would the lions get a piece of a–?
Grannymar said,
July 28, 2011 at 4:59 pm
Anil - As nature intended.
blackwatertown - I can’t win ‘em all!
Ramana -
Nick - Shhhh! You never know who might be listening!
Mayo - A piece of a donkey’s tail? Is that what you meant?
wisewebwoman said,
July 29, 2011 at 2:15 am
I’ll pass this on to my pun-loving friend….tx.
XO
WWW
Grannymar said,
July 29, 2011 at 9:22 am
WWW -