Thursday Special ~ Three Bears Story
A far more accurate account of the events of that fateful morning….
Baby bear goes downstairs, sits in his small chair at the table.
He looks into his small bowl. It is empty. ‘Who’s been eating my porridge?’ he squeaks.
Daddy Bear arrives at the big table and sits in his big chair. He looks into his big bowl and it is also empty. ‘Who’s been eating my porridge?!?’ he roars.
Mummy Bear puts her head through the serving hatch from the kitchen and yells, ‘For God’s sake, how many times do I have to go through this with you idiots?
It was Mummy Bear who got up first.
It was Mummy Bear who woke everyone in the house.
It was Mummy Bear who made the coffee.
It was Mummy Bear who unloaded the dishwasher from last night and put everything away.
It was Mummy Bear who swept the floor in the kitchen.
It was Mummy Bear who went out in the cold early morning air to fetch t he newspaper and croissants.
It was Mummy Bear who set the damn table.
It was Mummy Bear who walked the bloody dog, cleaned the cat’s litter tray, gave them their food, and refilled their water.
And now that you’ve decided to drag your sorry bear-arses downstairs and grace Mummy Bear with your grumpy presence, listen carefully, because I’m only going to say this once….
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‘I HAVEN’T MADE THE F***ING PORRIDGE YET!
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Thank you Magpie 11 for the update on an old favourite.
nick said,
August 5, 2010 at 9:09 am
Excellent updated version! And now Mummy Bear’s running late for her job at Sweatshop plc so she hasn’t time to make the porridge, they’ll have to make it themselves.
gaelikaa said,
August 5, 2010 at 9:27 am
Serves them right!
steph said,
August 5, 2010 at 9:52 am
Sounds terribly familiar somehow except I don’t have a dog!
Grannymar said,
August 5, 2010 at 3:59 pm
Nick - I think they might head out looking for the big M sign!
Gaelikaa - Mammy Bear may be to blame this time, but she should have learned to delegate long ago.
Steph - I only have me to blame if there is no porridge on a morning!
bikehikebabe said,
August 5, 2010 at 9:11 pm
I’m Mommy Bear here. Papa Bear has his jobs that involve climbing up on the roof & such. But Papa Bear sometimes has to help Mommy Bear. Does she feel guilty. No Siree.
Grannymar said,
August 5, 2010 at 9:27 pm
BHB - Good for you!
Val said,
August 5, 2010 at 10:25 pm
Good thing there isn’t a teenage bear!
Grannymar said,
August 5, 2010 at 10:40 pm
Val - How right you are.
Rhyelysgranny said,
August 6, 2010 at 1:26 am
You owe me a new computer screen. My tea went all over it reading that.
Grannymar said,
August 6, 2010 at 8:03 am
RG - Don’t laugh with your mouth full!
Brighid said,
August 7, 2010 at 6:24 am
I’m to blame when there is no porridge ready around here. Fergus has not figured out how to work the stove, Yet.
Thanks for the laugh!
Grannymar said,
August 7, 2010 at 7:21 am
Brighid - You need to run porridge classes!
Rose said,
August 10, 2010 at 6:17 am
Love the new version. lol
Grannymar said,
August 10, 2010 at 8:52 am
Rose - Glad you enjoyed it!