Thursday Special ~ Will I Live to see 80?
I recently picked a new primary care doctor. After two visits and exhaustive lab tests, he said I was doing “fairly well” for my age (now over 60).
A little concerned about that comment, I couldn’t resist asking him, “Do you think I’ll live to be 80?”
He asked, “Do you smoke tobacco or drink beer or wine?”
“Oh no,” I replied. “I’m not doing drugs, either!”
Then he asked, “Do you eat rib-eye steaks and barbecued ribs?”
I said, “Not much — my former doctor said that all red meat is very unhealthy!”
“Do you spend a lot of time in the sun, like playing golf, sailing, hiking, or bicycling?”
“No, I don’t,” I said.
He asked, “Do you gamble, drive fast cars, or have a lot of sex?”
“No,” I said.
He looked at me and said,…
“Then, why do you even give a shit???”
,
,
Thats not me up there….. good old email sent it!
steph said,
August 13, 2009 at 8:28 am
C’mon Nancy!
Life those legs higher
steph said,
August 13, 2009 at 9:24 am
*Lift
(blame it on the pills)
Nick said,
August 13, 2009 at 9:25 am
So why did you choose a new toyboy, oops doctor?
Grannymar said,
August 13, 2009 at 9:31 am
@Steph - Pills? Thats your excuse!
@Nick - The storyteller did, not me. I spent yesterday with a wonderful team in preparation for my forthcoming hip surgery. All going to plan.
Rumuuser said,
August 13, 2009 at 12:17 pm
Nick, don’t you know, one toy boy is never enough for Grannymar. She needs a team of them.
Grannymar, I give a shit. You can tell that a******e PCD that I said so. Seriously however, why any way?
Grannymar said,
August 13, 2009 at 12:38 pm
Ramana, I need at least one on each arm…. for balance you know!
Calm down! I’m not planning on an early departure!
Geri Atric said,
August 13, 2009 at 12:47 pm
No but, what with all the cooking, photography, sewing, toyboys, blogging, and jaunting around to interesting places in your little car; how would you ever find time for sex, drugs and rock n’ roll - even if you were so inclined, which I know you’re not GM, although… just wait till after that hip off. Bet you’ll be gyrating with the best of them?!
Geri Atric said,
August 13, 2009 at 12:49 pm
*op’ (not off)
(idem Steph: blame it on the pills!).
Grannymar said,
August 13, 2009 at 1:10 pm
Geri, Between, you Steph and I there is some hell of a pill popping party going on!
Geri Atric said,
August 13, 2009 at 1:25 pm
‘Pill Popping Party’ - haha!
Steph has some impressive looking ‘bombs’ in her collection though doesn’t she? Couldn’t get those down my sore throat.
(Or, er, perhaps they’re not meant to go in that way……Steph?)
Maynard said,
August 13, 2009 at 1:29 pm
“You know you’re getting old when all the names (Toyboys–I added this) in your black book have M. D. after them. ”
Harrison Ford
Nancy said,
August 13, 2009 at 1:55 pm
@ Maynard,
OR, all the items in your grocery cart are labeled:
FOR THE FAST RELIEF OF……..
@Steph,
I know that looks like me, but I would NEVER wear Yellow socks with my pink leotards. I do have SOME class, you know….
Magpie11 said,
August 13, 2009 at 2:55 pm
Mmmmm!
steph said,
August 13, 2009 at 3:05 pm
You know what?
With you lot, who needs pills anyway?
Money couldn’t buy a better tonic
(Nancy, so it’s yellow socks only?)
Kate said,
August 13, 2009 at 4:17 pm
Brilliant!!! I think you are younger than all of us Grannymar - you wait till you have the new hip!!
Grannymar said,
August 13, 2009 at 4:25 pm
@Geri - I’m saying nuttin about where Steph keeps her pills!
@Maynard - I know I am old… ’cause the only time I am asked to pose topless nowadays, is when I go for a mammogram
@Nancy - Yellow socks are just your colour!
@Magpie - Mmmmm to you too!
@Steph - You mean I could make money out of this
@Kate - Young in heart, I hope!
Darlene said,
August 13, 2009 at 5:40 pm
That aerobic gal can’t be me; I couldn’t kick my leg that high and I would never wear a leotard!
Grannymar said,
August 13, 2009 at 5:58 pm
Darlene, don’t you worry about the leotard. When I get my new ’shock absorber’ I will call on you, bikehikebabe & Ramana then the four of us will put on a show of our special hippy sequence dancing. It might even make the Olympics for 2012
Darlene said,
August 13, 2009 at 7:28 pm
I am starting with the choreography now, Grannymar. I, 2, 3, kick - shake your bum and a - 1, 2, 3 kick. Shake, shake, shake.
Oops - I just fell down. Let’s try that last step again.
Grannymar said,
August 13, 2009 at 7:33 pm
Hang in there Darlene until I get my crutches!
Here, can you reach that one?
Maynard said,
August 13, 2009 at 7:34 pm
Darlene, do your dance in the water, so when you fall down, Grannymar will not have to pick you up! But be careful with that “bum” shaking , you may vibrate all of the water out of the pool!
Grannymar said,
August 13, 2009 at 7:35 pm
Maynard, I hope you did a Life saving course.
Maynard said,
August 13, 2009 at 8:52 pm
Grannymar, actually I got certified as a Life Guard in high school (43 years ago), but all I remember is –grab the hair of the drowning person and start swimming to shore. If you ladies keep shaking your “bums”, then , I think we would be able to walk to shore!
Grannymar said,
August 13, 2009 at 8:56 pm
Maynard, that Life Guard Certificate is nearly older than my teeth!
Jean Browman--Cheerful Monk said,
August 13, 2009 at 9:48 pm
Thanks for the best laugh of the day. Good luck with your new hip.
Darlene said,
August 13, 2009 at 10:50 pm
I might be able to clear the pool, but an ocean? I don’t think so. Come on, I’m pretty big but not that big.
Baino said,
August 13, 2009 at 10:56 pm
Haha . . .no that picture is me! Your doctor has a point! Party hard or go home I say!
Grannymar said,
August 13, 2009 at 11:11 pm
@Jean - Never mind my balance, I think I’ve lost my marbles…. I just put my hand out for a pen to reply to your comment!
@Darlene - We will keep bob, bob, bobbing along!
@Baino - My Doc won’t keep me in long enough to party.
kenju said,
August 14, 2009 at 3:00 am
That could be me in the pic, but I don’t exercise!
wisewebwoman said,
August 14, 2009 at 3:06 am
Between the pic and the shite you had me goin’ for a minute!
XO
WWW
Grannymar » Rehearsals have started said,
August 14, 2009 at 6:03 am
[...] it was decided in the comments to my blog post, that to help me on my way to hippy hoppy happiness when I get my new ’shock [...]
Grannymar said,
August 14, 2009 at 7:50 am
@Judy - That might be the case with many of us!
@WWW - Where were you going?