For Sale
In the next week or two I will need more oil. I checked out the latest prices the other night and it ranged from £311.00 to £349.65 for 900 Litres. Now my singing efforts would hardly raise the price of a fish supper and as for the dancing…. well we can forget all about that one thank you!
So what are the options?
Rent a room.
Sounds interesting and it would give the neighbours something to think about. If I rent a room do I want to be seen in all my morning glory minus the smile, wooden leg and glass eye? What if the house guest brought a pet snake, a tarantula or a german shepherd? Well now, that certainly needs more thought…..
There might be some chance if the German Shepherd wore lederhosen and yodelled!
Find a wealthy Toyboy.
If Tommy were a rich man,
Ya ha deedle deedle, bubba bubba deedle deedle dum.
All day long I’d bribe him with some buns.
If Tommy were a wealthy man.
I wouldn’t have to work hard.
Ya ha deedle deedle, bubba bubba deedle deedle dum.
If Tommy were a biddy biddy rich,
Yidle-diddle-didle-didle man.
But Lily might put up a fight, talons at dawn win no awards and we girls need to behave in Cork.
Sell my crown jewels
Alas, the burglars got there first and cleared anything worth more than a second glance.
So what will that leave?
Wait now, I got it!
Flog the Artwork!
I will be sad to let it go but needs must. It is a personally signed ‘One Off’, carefully thought out and designed. A perfect representation of a family group filled with sunshine and love. Now where is the number for Sotheby’s?
I should really keep it under wraps until it goes under the hammer, but on the other hand I would really appreciate your opinion…
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In case you are a little puzzled, we have our hands behind our backs - I know because I asked the artist! 
steph said,
January 13, 2009 at 9:34 am
Grannymar,
You wanted an opinion? I think the artist preferred ears to arms
Have you considered getting the house connected to natural gas or is it unavailable in your area?
With gas, you only pay as you use, rather than in advance. And it never runs out unless of course, you forget to pay the bill!
Grannymar said,
January 13, 2009 at 9:43 am
Steph,
The large ears were so we could hear the grass grow! “AND… feet were easy - a six and a six backwards!”
GAS! Piped gas? The only gas we have around here… well you don’t want to know about it!
Natural gas is available in the greater Belfast area but not out here in the wilds of Co Antrim!
Nick said,
January 13, 2009 at 10:33 am
Goodness, I hope it’s well insured. Such consummate brushwork and flawless composition will push it over the £million mark straightaway.
cathy said,
January 13, 2009 at 10:52 am
Goodness, Grannymar, was it very cold then too, that you had to wear your dress up to the chin? And earmuffs?!
d@\/e said,
January 13, 2009 at 11:45 am
Amanda [Amanda.Blackmore@sothebys.com] worked for Sotheby’s when they had an office in , my neighbours, Greyabbey House. I had quite a few people call at my house and thought it was Sotheby’s then and was told by Mrs Montgomery of Greyabbey House I should’ve let on I worked for Sotheby’s and valued the items they’d brought, I never did that. If I’d valued your artwork I reckon it’s priceless and as an auctioneer I don’t really need the comission from that for more drink money.
Magpie11 said,
January 13, 2009 at 12:58 pm
If renting out you should ensure that there is “A French Widow in every bedroom.” (G. Hoffnung….Letter from a Swiss Hotelier who was “not good in bath but superb in bed” IIRC)
As for the artwork I think we should appeal to the nations so that it can be kept in its place…..I mean to say it’s a lot newer than those ones from the Bridgewater connection…they’re about 400 years old aren’t they? We cannot let art like that go abroad……..I’m rather impressed that one so young should have been aware of sunspots.
kenju said,
January 13, 2009 at 1:59 pm
How could you even think of selling such great art!!?? Better to freeze and keep it, I think…..LOL
Darlene said,
January 13, 2009 at 4:17 pm
There has to be another answer rather than selling that priceless art. The rich Tomboy is the happiest solution. Now if I could only find one. Sigh!
wisewebwoman said,
January 13, 2009 at 4:58 pm
Daddy always looked good in his red pants.
XO
WWW
Grannymar said,
January 13, 2009 at 6:06 pm
I’m back from my window shopping and dreaming!
@Nick – Do you really think I can look forward to twilight years of sheer comfort?
@Cathy – I had no scarf and a hat would have spoiled my curls.
@D@\/e – Priceless like my Elly!
@Magpie – If I have to wait 400 years… I better become ‘A French Widow’!
@Judy - With such early talent, all of five years, I think I should shiver longer and save it for the nation!
@Darlene – When I gather my Toyboys I will keep you in mind!
@WWW – Elly’s dad only wore Navy or grey trousers with creases as sharp as a knife blade. Air Force training will out!
Jefferson Davis said,
January 13, 2009 at 8:26 pm
I love those ears! Reminds me of myself.
The toyboy idea sounds grand. Do ya have any suggesstions for a toygirl for me? 
I use propane for heating. The average price for here is $0.62 a litre. It was more when I filled up my tank back in November. It will inevitably go back up again.
Baino said,
January 13, 2009 at 9:27 pm
If you told Sotheby’s it was drawn by an elephant . . . . .priceless! I’d have thought electricity would be even cheaper than oil Grannymar?
Grannymar said,
January 13, 2009 at 9:43 pm
@JD - There is nothing wrong with your ears. My Toyboys are all grand. Are you asking me to match make for you? Next you will have doing a match-making column of a Saturday!
@Baino - Don’t mention Electric! We have been conned for years in Norn Iron into paying sky high prices for our lekkie, way more than the mainland. My DD for my electricity to cover power, lights and cooking took a major jump a few months back.
Paddy Bloggit said,
January 14, 2009 at 12:27 am
I have a room for you GM!
Grannymar said,
January 14, 2009 at 10:03 am
Paddy,
Which shed is it in?
kenju said,
January 14, 2009 at 10:59 pm
Grannymar, will you take the letter “R” for the meme? I can’t wait to see what you come up with.
Grannymar said,
January 15, 2009 at 9:08 am
Judy,
Letter ‘R’ it will be, might be the weekend!
Right I am running round in rings in a ruminative state!
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