Sometimes death is a blessed relief!

I am glad you found this helpful.

My brother, my dad and I have been grieving differently. Your organized and practical approach to all the arrangements in Jack’s final days sounds just like what my dad did. My brother, very loyal, was marvelous that last night, keeping her comfortable, holding her hand for hours. I thought and observed, and cried very little. The long, slow approach left us lots of time to spend together, and we didn’t have unresolved issues. I miss her terribly, but she’s only as far away as my thoughts, and that’s a comfort. I hope it stays, that feeling that I know just what she would say, how she’d react to something I encounter from day to day.

There’s a Lyle Lovett song that starts out,
“I went to a funeral
And Lord, it made me happy
To see all those people
I ain’t seen
Since the last time somebody died.”

It was really so good to see all those people, it meant the world to me. If I ever have to decide if I’m going to attend a visitation or funeral now, it will be yes, because it helps in a way that nothing else at any other time quite can match.

As we sat there in the hospice, listening to her breathe, and then breathe differently, and then not breathe, the phrase that occurred to me was “the miracle of death”. I don’t mean miracle in the sense of a good thing that brings surprising triumph, but in the sense of something awesome.

Thank you, thank you, thank you.

I hope it brings the comfort but that you will not need it for a longtime.

My sympathy, thoughts and prayers are with you. Remember the good times.