Thursday Special - IF MY BODY WERE A CAR
If my body were a car, this is the time I would be thinking about trading it in for a newer model. I’ve got bumps and dents and scratches in my finish and my paint job is getting a little dull … but that’s not the worst of it.
My headlights are out of focus and it’s especially hard to see things up close.
My traction is not as graceful as it once was. I slip and slide and skid and bump into things even in the best of weather. My whitewalls are stained with varicose veins.
It takes me hours to reach my maximum speed. My fuel rate burns inefficiently.
But here’s the worst of it –
Almost every time I sneeze, cough or sputter…..either my radiator leaks or my exhaust backfires!
steph said,
January 3, 2008 at 10:37 am
Hilarious!
Never mind the bodywork, it’s what’s on the inside that counts!
You obviously need a [Toyboy] mechanic to rev up that engine of yours!
Dorothy Stahlnecker said,
January 3, 2008 at 11:30 am
It’s true, what inside is the really important part. I need to think of what kind of car I’d like to be….hmmmm BMW…….
Thanks for getting me to think..
Dorothy from grammology
remember to call gram
http://grammology.com
steph said,
January 3, 2008 at 12:01 pm
Dorothy - if my body was a car, it would have been sent to the scrap heap years ago. I think they broke the mould after they made me
Grannymar said,
January 3, 2008 at 3:26 pm
Sorry girls, I had a busy morning interviewing prospective Toyboy Chauffeurs. Now I need to lie down in a darkened room for a while and think about them!
chrisb said,
January 3, 2008 at 4:00 pm
Now remember some newer models are all show and cannot deliver the goods!!
Betty said,
January 3, 2008 at 9:57 pm
Funny, I have the same problem. But, then, I was built for comfort, not for speed. lol
Wisewebwoman said,
January 4, 2008 at 7:48 am
That’s the part about aging that I like to call a symphony of sound, GM, when every orifice has its own voice and likes to be heard, seen or smelt.
XO
WWW
Linda S Amstutz said,
March 14, 2009 at 6:09 pm
My name is Linda S Amstutz and I am the author of the essay, IF MY BODY WERE A CAR. You can view my copyright at http://www.braceguard.com/ifmybodywereacar.htm. Publishing my essay without permission is copyright infringement and a federal offense.
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